The oddness of friendships

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Friendships are a funny old thing. Full of ups and downs, tears of laughter and the not so happy tears. Friendships can be the best thing in your life. Sometimes they can be the worst.

Friendships are a tricky thing for people with mental health difficulties. My anxiety and depression makes it hard for me to both make friends and keep them. My head is constantly full of questions – ‘why would this person like me?’, ‘am I funny or interesting enough?’, ‘why did I say that? what must they think’. You kinda get the picture…

Friendships are a hard thing to maintain when you don’t simply like your own space, you fundamentally need it. When you find the world too much to take sometimes and have to cancel things, say no to invitations and shut down away from social media. And then you realise that you have been far too effective at reaching for your own space all the time and no one notices when you do withdraw. That you feel alone.

Friendships are sometimes surprising.  The ‘are you ok?’ that lets you know that you have not been forgotten about. The person who says they love you for your weirdness – who lets you know that it is okay to be you, that the right people will want to be your friend because you are you. The unusual friendships you can form through unexpected ways. The support you get from an Instagram friend you have never met. Who makes you feel that you do matter. The friendship that fills that space in you.

Friendships are sometimes toxic and sometimes the thing that saves you. They are not always easy to find, keep or to let go. They always do matter though and sometimes they literally can change someone’s life. Tell your friends that you love them. Be there for them. You never know what a difference that could make. Or when it might make a difference to you

 

Image from Pixabay